January 4th, 2004

darwinesque

I'm a little yellow fish in a deep blue sea...won't somebody SAVE ME!!!!

Last night...hmmm...

Was so bored that I went into Netgoth IRC as usual to bemoan the fact...saw alienfox online...so we made plans to go to Zero's after all!!

Foxy arrived over at mine at about 9pm, we drank a bottle of red between us and sat drooling over Malice Mizer videos and eating marshmallow pumpkins for an hour...took a few arms length crappy photos...and then went to The Bank at 10:30 where we met up with Leon, Shauny, Ian and Sexy Simon.

Simon is tall, thin, REALLY long dark hair, and goth. He's a wonderful friend, but oh so gay it's not fair:/

*grin*

More beer, Leon went through my handbag and stole my sunglasses, which he wore on  his head for the next hour...and we all headed off to Zeros.

Zero's has three floors...

Top floor = Twinkles...Kylie, Madonna, Christina, Britney, Disco, 80's stalwarts that we demand...that kind of thing...
Middle floor = banging choons...mostly dance remixes of the above lol
Ground/Basement floor = large bar area, seating 'arrangements', pool table room, cloakroom.

Twinkle was looking her/his wonderful self in a big red 'thing', blonde wig and gold shiny false eyelashes...played all the favourite songs...

We did 'You Spin Me' (Dead or Alive) followed by 'Help! I'm a fish' (complete with actions), Simon and I fell over for the Timewarp, Foxy and I were so drunk we perv danced and did actions as usual to the regular Twinkle cheese...Madonna 'Like A Prayer' springs to mind...

'down on my knees I wanna take you there...'

*rolls eyes*

I got bored at about 1am, after we had a bit of a riot in the 'ladies' (read unisex) loos...Foxy trying to climb over the cubicle while I was in there...that sort of thing...thank god the film ran out on the camera I took with me!!

Went downstairs and sat in the cloakroom with Simon for an hour...Maria arrived (transsexual friend of mine) and talked to me for a while...then I got hungry and I decided I NEEDED cheesy chips...

Shauny, Leon, Me and Becky left at this point, and wandered off down the road for cheesy chips, chips and kebabs...then back to Leons. Shauny and I sat on the steps and ate our chips whilst discussing the crapness of Plymouth compared to other places etc etc and then got a taxi home.

So I got home at about 3am this morning...rolling drunk with a slight headache...after half a bottle of red, a pint of Tetley's and a large glass of cheap fizzy white which the bar staff gave us in Zeros.

The club would remain open till 4am, and if I'd stayed I would have been getting home nearer 5am...but as it was I was a tad bored by that point anyway...Foxy went home at 1am while I was still in the club, and the music was a bit samey...hasn't changed much since I went out last September...has it really been that long??

It's a good night out if you can last the distance...and not get an early hangover as I did. But it does cost 4 quid to get in...which is a bit steep. Next Saturday I think, if it's on, that I will be going to the punk night at Tramps with wildgift93 etc...meeting at the Nowhere first most likely...

Well, that was my Saturday night...now I'm sat here bored again...was planning on going to the cinema...but I think it may be a bit late now lolol. I need to get up earlier in the day, but I think I'm going into a 'catch-up' kind of state after a month of theatre-based sleep-lack...

*yawns*

Off to make coffee...
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darwinesque

LOST : ONE BIG BROWN DOG!!! (A notable work of fiction indeed)

Note: I wrote this ridiculous piece of fiction in 1994 or thereabouts...one of those 'sat at the typewriter - make it up as you go along' kind of things...utter drivel, but it makes me laugh!!
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LOST : ONE BIG BROWN DOG
A daring tale of Canine Kidnap...

I was walking down my street not so long ago when it came to my attention that I was being followed by a big brown dog. Normally I would have just carried on walking and ignored the poor lost animal, but on this particular day I found its soppy doggy eyes far too endearing to be able to stop myself.

I took it home with me.

I'm not normally in the habit of kidnapping other people's dearly beloved pooches, it's not like me at all...it's just that I simply couldn't help it. It stood there and looked at me with a face that seemed to say "LOST : ONE BIG BROWN DOG" and "FEED ME"...the latter being what doggy eyes usually say to you when they fix you with them.

Anyway, I, of course, was entirely taken in and suddenly remembered the large tin of 'doggychunks' that I had left over from my mother's last visit ("Don't forget I'm bringing Charlie", she said) and without further ado I whisked the dog off home with me.

Once home, the dog fed and me putting my feet up with the new Radio Times in my lap, I finally realised what I'd done. I can be so stupid sometimes - acting without first thinking of the possible consequences - I really hadn't stopped to think at all!!

Now I had a fat happy animal in my kitchen who looked like he was settling down for the night - and most likely the rest of the week to boot - and I didn't have any idea where he had come from or who he might belong to...I hadn't even so much as asked him his name!!

What on earth was I going to do??

One thing was clear, I had to form a plan of action. I also had to buy more 'Doggychunks'.

This, then, is what I did. Firstly, I decided to call the dog 'Gerald', for no other reason than because it suited him. That being done, I took a trip to the local Post Office, along the way stocking up on doggy supplies, and placed a notice in the window saying "FOUND : ONE BIG BROWN DOG" - followed with my home phone number so that people could contact me should it be necessary...

Then I went home. To wait.

Three months have passed and still not one person has contacted me re. missing dog. Gerald and I are enjoying our time together and he has become a wonderful and extremely affectionate companion. We have spoken to each other and he has expressed a wish to remain with me rather than try his luck at the various dog's homes in the area. Through a somewhat mutual decision (oh, those big doggy eyes) Gerald is now MY dog.

HE IS STAYING WITH ME.

And we are both very pleased with the arrangement.

In conclusion, we both fully agree that having the telephone disconnected the day after placing the advertisement has been, in hindsight, the very best decision (and not in the least impulsive) that I have made for a very, very long time!!

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